it’s the fate of all blonde men to die a gruesome peculiar hamster-like death
‘why does lestat see claudia as a romantic rival when louis is gay it makes no sense’ girl because he is insane. because he is fucking insane. because he is stephen king amy dunne last ten minutes of hereditary crazy. because he is mommy dearest the shining silence of the lambs hitchcock blonde norman bates unwell.
Every day I wake up and cast Speak With Animals.
“what do you listen to?” music. “what kind of music?” the kind that gets my dick hard what the fuck are these questions
(yearns for a past that does not exist) (yearns for a past that does not exist) (yearns for a past that does not exist) (yearns for a past that does not exist) (yearns for a past that does not exist)
Kind of a Reddit AITA post but sometimes it is a little funny to fuck with people in ways that deliberately conform to a stereotype of what they must think of you. the other day I was talking to my friend and I randomly said that I wanted a pet chimpanzee. I’d dress it in person clothes (dungarees and hats) and I’d teach it to love science fiction. And this girl nearby was like “you know how dangerous those things are, right? Also how unethical it is to keep an ape as your pet for your own amusement” and I was already seeing where the conversation was going so I was pretending ignorance like “yea but it wouldn’t just be for my amusement. It would have practical points too.” And she ignored that statement entirely to say “Well chimpanzees can rip faces off” and I was like. What’s the most frustrating thing I can say now. Finally settled on “Mine wouldn’t do that though.” and you could tell she wanted to hurt me very very badly. Like a chimpanzee would if I had one as a pet
they should invent a phrase as evocative as im going to kill myself that isnt about killing yourself
lying across the autopsy table all by yourself, gorgeous?